I don’t know about you, but for the longest time, I made a full-time career out of letting things bother me—then following it up with a bad mood (or what my grandmother used to call having “a bit of shit on the liver”). I’ve talked myself into situations that spiraled out of control simply because I didn’t pause to think before speaking. In the heat of a disagreement, words can fly out of your mouth faster than you can stop them—like watching a bad movie unfold in slow motion, knowing it won’t end well, but saying it anyway.
Moments like these offer a real insight into what’s going on inside us. When we let our guard down, we reveal our deepest frustrations, often without considering the impact on those around us. So, how do we break free from this cycle before it derails our entire day?
Taking Back Control
The key is taking time for yourself. Step outside, shake it off, sit in a quiet space, and take a few deep breaths. Be mindful of your thoughts—acknowledge them, then shift them toward something that serves you rather than something that drags you down.
I’m learning that my happiness, peace, and success all start with me. It’s about how I choose to think, how I show up in situations, and how I show up for myself. If I walk around expecting confrontation, getting easily offended, or bracing for a fight, chances are, I’ll attract exactly that. And let’s be honest—none of that leads to anything good.
For years, I believed that if you didn’t fight back, you were weak. Looking back, I have no idea where I picked up that mindset—most likely from childhood, where toughness was a survival mechanism. I carried that belief into adulthood, but deep down, I don’t want to be that person. I want to be softer, more nurturing, more at peace. My husband is also a strong-willed person, and sometimes I wonder—what was it about the era we grew up in that shaped us this way?
Unpacking Limiting Beliefs
This journey of self-discovery has been eye-opening. I’m peeling back layers of beliefs and behaviors that were ingrained in me from a young age. For years, I believed that because I had my first child at 16, my life was essentially over. Imagine that! So many of the things we were told in childhood still shape our adult lives, influencing our confidence, our choices, and even our happiness.
I look back now and feel sad for the version of me that didn’t know she was allowed to dream beyond the role of “mother.” I was told how to act, how to dress, what was considered “appropriate”—my creative expression was stifled, and my individuality was pushed aside. I know I’m not alone in this. Many of us grew up under these rigid expectations, carrying them into adulthood without even realizing it. But here’s the truth: those old paradigms don’t define us. They can be unlearned, and we can reclaim who we were meant to be.
The Power of Change
I can’t believe how much one program has transformed my mindset. It’s changed the way I see the world, the way I speak, and even the way I listen. This kind of inner work is deep—it’s not always easy, but it’s so worth it.
If you’re feeling stuck, don’t leave things to chance. You don’t have to repeat the same patterns you grew up with. The time to change is now, and when you start believing in yourself, amazing things begin to happen.
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